Hello darkness my old friend....
posted 2020-02-09 21:39:43

So I'm in a predicament.
My mom died a few months back. She was a shot person and I still haven't sorted it out. My cousin died Wednesday. And my "best friend blew. Me. Off, it was find because I assumed she was busy etc and I didn't want to talk about it. But I got Jeffree star mystery box and amd. Had. A. Fraction of joy. Then I receive a call from another friend who ran into said best friend. Best friend told her to call me cause she just can't deal with me right now( I always drop everything for her)
Fast forward to bar my drunk ass husband ours the fact that her and I ha e feelings for each other. We ended up making out I held her til she was safe and asleep. Now I feel that she is sober there will be regret. I think my stupid ass offered to bring her into the family. We are not poly per se. But here is many attachments on both sides. Husband knows I'm upset and nervous. But I also will not force someone to discuss anything until they are ready. So I feel that I should not get drunk around her just so I can control the situation and make sure she doesn't do things she will regret and so I don't get hurt. I'm trying really hard not to shut down out of fear.... Wish me luck, give advice, anything






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