caterpillar:
posted 2020-01-22 01:41:49

there's a good chance i'm going to marry this woman. she's what i wanted, in a lot of ways; i'm what she wanted, in a lot of ways. five months dating, but we know there's the capacity for it, and we know it'll take time and a whole process of making sure and checking. i like the idea, she likes it too.

cyan told me he's planning to move back home at some point, far away from here. i figured, but i hadn't really dealt with it. we talked a lot about it. it's ok, mostly. it's hard but ok.

she told me it's ok if i want to try to find a new chill boyfriend after he leaves. i don't want to. i just want cyan, at least visiting each other sometimes. i don't know if this will happen.

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wikked: I didn't want to fuck you but you're pretty when i lie
posted 2020-01-20 23:47:08

so my phone is dead and I am bored, first and foremost. I don't know what is more pitiful-the fact that I am sulking around because I don't have a phone, or the mild feeling of panic because I rely so heavily on it for work and keeping tabs on my family. after missing the call on my cell from my brother telling me our dad had died, I have a deep-seeded fear that the same will happen with my mom. sigh.

*so why do you REALLY pout around without your phone?
-I miss that little bit of contact through the work day. maybe getting some encouragement-giving or receiving. I like being silly. I like clever memes. I like that today was a bummer of a day and the like 10 minutes we talked made me smile and feel better. that's nice.
*I feel like 'be careful' is appropriate here...
-I know. I am walking a very, very thin line. I want to head north on vacation. I wanna get lots of pictures and just drive for a couple of days, see where I end up; hopefully where I have been looking to go for a little minute.
*uh could you be just a bit more vague? Jesus.
-one day someone will find this. after I kill myself it will come out that I have had this since my early 20s (turning 40 soon). they are gonna pick back through everything and think what the fuck... lol none of this makes sense!
*so?
-so I dunno. i am bummed and bored. my playmate went to bed hours ago and I mostly completely missed him. stupid no phone! so bored. kinda tired of smoking weed; I am fairly high but still nothing to occupy me. guess I am gonna go pout on the couch and shop for phones. insert eye rolling here.

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Remember M.E.: Love fades but herpes is forever
posted 2020-01-20 19:15:00

Got tested, I was totally clean back in July or August so sometime between Then and now I got herpes 1. Negative for everything else. They say itís dormant. I havenít had a cold sore or anything yet.

Thatís been one of my biggest fears is having a nasty ass blister on my lip.

Iíve only kissed FT and 1 since August. I havenít gone down on anyone since my ex and so thatís almost a year ago. And the only people Iíve shared drinks with is 1, FT, and my ex

At least itís not genital herpes.

I think itís from 1. 1 always gives bjís with condoms, FT always gave head with no condoms...

According to google 3.7 billion people under 50 have it. So 67% of the global population has it.

Called 1 she didnít answer. So I sent a text asking to talk.

The one Girl/incident I was worried about getting lip herpes happened back in April....the test in July shouldíve caught that.

1 just called, sheís had it since she was little and itís not a big deal in her country.

Hopefully I didnít give it to FT.



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arnoud: fine is nice
posted 2020-01-20 05:17:28

Hey,

I've got a job.
A wife.
Two kids that make me smile.

A damn house.

And I can still login to this site.
And I still feel the need to post.



Hello past self.
Things are going to be ok.
Not perfect, but fine.
Fine is good enough. Fine is nice.





    reply by caterpillar
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s n a p s:
posted 2020-01-19 15:24:20

Our dog had a small wart like bump on her flank this summer. It got a bit bigger, so we invested a shit ton of money for a ďin home visitĒ vet, thinking it will make her relaxed around the doctor (she love visitors and kids and us, obviously, but hates the vet). Even after tranquilizers and Valium she still freaks out apparently. Dog just hates vets. Anyway, They give us pills and tell us they may need to remove it, but see if it works first.

It worked at first, until early December, when the bump became this huge bloody cyst like thing. Get the damn vets back, we agree the surgery needs to happen, but they canít schedule it for several weeks out. I was okay with that, we need to save some money for the procedure, plus I was hoping it would get better.

Itís not better. Itís worse. Now itís this pinkish festering thing that smells and I just feel so bad for the dog. Sheís pretty active and normal, really, but this is obviously a tumor and after the operation whatís next if it comes back?

We got her from the shelter about 6 years ago and sheís been a good companion. My kids adore her. She was with me for some very dark times, my companion when my husband travels, my nagging reminder to get outside and walk. Iím not always like ďoh my furbabyĒ, in fact Iím the least sentimental about her and at times have been pretty cold about her (like I talk about the golden retriever puppy Iíll get to replace her when she goes) but the actual thought of her being gone makes the grief very real and I canít stop choking up. I keep telling myself how lucky I am that my dogs health is the only bad part of my life right now, but then I see her eyes and think about how devastated my kids will be when sheís gone (especially my oldest, they love each other the most, sheís really his dog) and it just feels like no matter what thereís nothing good coming out of this at all.



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the best of fschmidt:
posted 2020-01-18 13:48:13

Jews are one of many problems, but they are a real problem that no sound society should tolerate.

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Epigenetic:
posted 2020-01-16 13:52:04

Things are going ok, I've got a few days off after management called me in a day early. I worked a nightshift and then slept for like 18 hours. This ruined a date day with A. I'd planned on getting up and us going out, but I totally crashed. ....but ... I don't mind being woken up. She has such a massive abuse history that contradicting me or waking me upcutting me off or whatever scares her. I don't really care if you wake me up, especially if I've been asleep for like 10 hours.



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Hikikomori:
posted 2020-01-12 18:58:11

Wagie wagie get in cagie

All day long you sweat and ragie

NEET is comfy

NEET is cool

NEET is free from work and school

Wagie trapped and wagie dies

NEET eats tendies, sauce and fries

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zzzzzzzzzzzzzz:
posted 2020-01-10 23:06:18

.

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44556:
posted 2020-01-10 23:05:56

.

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